Should I give that bum a dollar?

Feb 21 2007

Phil Collins wrote this really cool song about a poor homeless woman who is ignored by a guy she asks for help. I think its called "Another day in Paradise". It's really touching and sad and makes you want to go out and just help every homeless person you can find. I know I used to feel really bad, I never really wanted to give them money cause I realised if I did I'd never be able to keep any :).

I saw this documentary once about what would happen if you gave a bum $100,000. They actually gave a bum $100,000 and filmed what he did with it. Do you know what he did with it? In about 9 month he had less than $5,000 left. He bought a car for one friend in less than a week of having the money, then he bought two trucks, one for himself and another for a lady he met etcetera, etcetera.

One of the statistics they quoted was that it wasn't just that one bum, 2 out of three people who get an unexpected large sum of money waste it all.

I thought that this was going to be a long page and maybe it might be sometime soon but that's about it for now. Do you want your hard earner money being spent on good times for someone else when you barely have enough to pay your tuition or to go on that vacation?

The thing is that whether its that poor lady in Phil Collins song, or that guy from the "Pursuit of Happyness" or me when my landlady swindled me and kicked me out of my rental and I didn't have money saved up (yes, officially speaking I've been homeless). People usually end up homeless because they have a problem managing their money, and giving them more or "helping" by giving them anything doesn't help them at all in my opinion. It just helps them think they can continue how they've been going because they can.

I guess this is gonna be a little long anyway, I just needed to warm up :)

When we support people's bad habits as a society we fail them and its mainly because we can't say no. For example I used to bum cigarettes in university. If a day had passed and I couldn't have bummed a cigarette from someone I would have probably come much closer to quitting than I ever did but people who hated giving me would give in and give me one which basically allowed me to keep coming back. Even though I knew they didn't want to give me I asked anyway because they never came out and said no. A couple people came out and said so plain and direct and them I never asked again.

I've bummed cigarettes but mainly because I have no problem giving someone when I have. Some of my friends think I'm so brazen but I think its because they don't get that smokers' camaraderie which I guess is why people put up with me so much :)

As a member of society I accept blame for supporting weakness but not when it comes to people asking for money. I might support someone having bad study habits by helping them do a project last minute (not a lot) or poor organisation skills by letting a deadline pass but money's a whole other cricket match (ball game :P). And since that documentary not even food will I give.

One confident beggar tried to put me in my place as he said because even though he begged he still had his self-respect. I think he was upset because I refused to give him money in front of a group of people. I explained that I would not give him money because I disapproved of what he was doing. I said I would never beg for money and further I would never like to see or encourage any member of my family or my friends to beg. He "boiled down like bhagi" and disappeared from the scene.

I don't expect this will change anyone's mind. I've said it to my mom several times and even when people take their kids with them begging which I think is worse than abortion and she also disagress with, she still goes ahead and gives them money, helping to ensure that instead of giving up and trying to do some washing or cleaning someone's yard, they're going to be right back there again tomorrow with their kid.